Parents

Assalamu Alikum
As promised in my earlier post
Appreciation
let me try to pen down few lines on the Islamic perspective on Parents - Children relationship.

After my post we in Kerala were destined to read the worst ever case where an old mother neglected by a new generation daughter was attacked by worms! If you are a Malayali it is worth reading the blog bost about it here Old is NOT Gold

As per a hadees(saying) from Prophet Mohammed (SA) kindness to parents is the second most loved deed in the sight of Allah (Almighty God), after Salat(5 times obligatory prayer in Islam) at its proper time!

"And we have enjoined on man to be good and dutifull to his parents" (Quran Chapter 29, Verse -8)

"And your Rabb has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutifull to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: "My Rabb! bestow on them your mercy as they did bring me up when I was young" (Quran Chapter 31, Verse -14)

"Worship Allah and join none with him (in worship); and do good to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, the poor, the neighbour who is near of kin, the neighbour who is a stranger, the companion by your side, the wayfarer (you meet), and those (slaves) whom your right hands possess (Quran Chapter 4, Verse -36)

Here is another beautifull Hadees(saying) from prophet (SA) about the importance of Mother over all others.

Abu Hurairah (RA, the companion of Prophet Mohammed (SA)reported:
A person came to Allah's messenger (SA) and asked, "Who among people is most deserving my fine treatment?" He(SA) said, "Your Mother". He again asked "Who next?". "Your Mother" the prophet (SA) replied again. He asked "who next?". He (Prophet SA) said again, "Your Mother". He again asked, "Then Who?" Thereupon he (SA) said "Then your Father". (Al Bukhari and Muslim).

This is the respect each woman as mother is eligible to get in an Islamic environment. What to say about "the modern daughter" who throw her mother to the worms!!!

The daughter is a MCA graduate and working in a good position in a government firm. She used to appear in a good TV program earlier named "Old is gold!". Such stories should open the eyes of all concerned in sustainable human development.

Man will not feel until he gets affected directly.
When you read daily about road accidents, does it move your mind?
When you read the warnings about global warming, does it really bother you?

This is the problem with general human mind set, he don't normally care until it hits home. Until someone dear and near to us gets hit we never bother.

Such stories reminds us again and again the importance of the wisdom given to us by the last Prophet Mohammed (SA) and the last veda to humanity "holy Quran".

"My Rabb! bestow on my parents your mercy as they did bring me up when I was young"

Appreciation / Parents and Children

This is a powerful message for our modern society. We seem to have lost our bearing & our sense of direction.


One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.

He passed the first interview; the director did the last interview.
The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.

The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?"
The youth answered "none".

The director asked, "Was it your father who paid for your school fees?"
The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.

The director asked, "Where did your mother work?"
The youth answered, "My mother worked as laundry woman.
The director requested the youth to show his hands.
The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect.

The director asked, "Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?"
The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.

The director said, "I have a request. “When you go back today, go and clean your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.”

The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands.
His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the young man.

The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.

This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.

After finishing the cleaning of his mother’s hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother.

That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.

Next morning, the youth went to the director's office.

The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: "Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"

The youth answered, "I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes'

The Director asked, "Please tell me your feelings."

The youth said:
1. I know now what appreciation is. Without my mother, there would not have been the successful me today.
2. By working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done.
3. I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationships.

The director said, "This is what I am looking for to be my manager.
I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently and as a team. The company's performance improved tremendously.

A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop "entitlement mentality" and would always put him self first. He would be ignorant of his parent's efforts. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. For this kind of a person, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying the children instead?*

You can let your children live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, you want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your children learn how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learn how to work with others to get things done.

Courtsey Br. Sabeel Saleem for sending the text by email.

Now read what Khalil Gibran wrote about children here:



http://gatesandwindows.blogspot.com/2010/12/your-children-are-not-your-children.html

I think this has gone too long. Wait a little for my next post about the Islamic perspective on the relation with Parents and Children.

Onthe door step of Hijri year 1432 - Another reminder of time

Today it is the 27th day of month Dul-Hijja, the last friday in this Hajri calender year 1431. Just three days remaning to start the new year 1432H.

Year 1431Hijri:

- 12 months
- 52 Weeks
- 360 days
- 864 hours
- 518, 400 Minutes
- 31, 104,000 seconds

How did we spent this 31 million seconds?
The big question is that how many seconds we have made as investment for our future life? The real life after death?

Many of these were special days, hours and seconds.

Month of Ramadan : 2,592,000 seconds
52 fridays: 4,492,800 seconds
10 days in the month of Dul hijja: 864,000 seconds
Several other special days (as listed below) each day with 86,400 seconds:

- Fasting day on 9th and 10th of the month of Muharram
- Fasting day on 9th of the month of Dul hijja (Arafa day)
- six fasting days in the month of Shawwal
- weekly fasting days of mondays and thursdays
- Middle three days of fasting on each month (14th, 15th and 16th)

Allah marks every good deed with atleast 10 rewards against it. The reward may rise up to 700 times and even unlimited times like in the case of the reward for fasting in Ramadan.

The alloted time in this life is limited for each one of us. As Vaikkam Mohammed Basheer, the great writer of Kerala said,
അല്ലാഹുവിന്റെ ഖജനാവിലാണ് അനനദമായ സമയമുള്ളത് (Eternal storage of TIME is in the custody of Allah). The success of a human being lies in making the best out of this limited time allotment.

Prophet Moahmmed (SA) said: (Addunyaa Mazraatul Alkhira) The life in this world is a farm land for riping in the life after death. Yes, the winner in the life after death will be the smart "farmer" in this world!

At the closure of an year it is a good practice to make a balance sheet for the past year and to make a year plan for the coming year.

Lost time can never be caught again. Future is not certain. The trick of success is to engage in the present! to live in the present. Make use of each moment before it drops!

Never fail to make the best use of the time.

- The ONE who is in the sky will be mercifull to those who show mercy to those in the earth.
- The parable of a good word (Divine message - the true religion) is like a good tree whose root is firmly fixed and its branches (reach) to the sky. It brings forth its fruit at all times, by the leave of its Lord. (Quran:14: 24&25.

Try to fill each moment with some virtue.
It is not hard. Once you practice it becomes and enjoyment.

- Witness the word (Kalima) and practice your life accordingly.
- Make your time filled with the praise of God (Five time prayer, reciting Salath on Prophet (SA), Other supplications, Reading Quran, Making Tasbeeh, Tahmmed and Takbeer,....its easy while you work, walk, standing, sitting or lying!.......wherever you be engaged!)
- Share and give whatever you have and whatever you know. (Of wealth) give both compulsory part and Sadaka. Even making a smile at your brother is a Sadaka!!!....yes it is easy when you start practicing.
- Observe fasting, one of the most strong tool for tazkiya (Self purification). In addition to the compulsory fasting during the month of Ramadan strong (successful) muslims did observe fasting on so many other days of the year as mentioned above.
- Perform pilgrimages as and when one is physically, psycologically and financially fit.
- Even the removal obstacles from the street is counted by Prophet Moahmmed (SA) as part of Iman (Fundamental Beliefs Islam).
- Enjoin in all what is good and disengage from all what is bad and evil (Quran says: Taawanoo Alal Birri Wattaqwa wala Taawanoo Alal Ithmi Wal O'dwaan)

Start planning for the year 1432H. Aim the star (Jannatul Firdous), you can reach the moon (atleast). Remeber the words of Prophet (SA) that the least facilities given in Janna (paradise) is better than the facilities available with a mighty king in this world!


Prepared from the spirit of the Friday khutba (Speech) I attended today in Jeddah.

Irish Bailout

It is a slow day in a damp little Irish town. The rain is beating down and the streets are deserted. Times are tough, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit. On this particular day a rich German tourist is driving through the town, stops at the local hotel and lays a €100 note on the desk, telling the hotel owner he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one to spend the night. The owner gives him some keys and, as soon as the visitor has walked upstairs, the hotelier grabs the €100 note and runs next door to pay his debt to the butcher. The butcher takes the €100 note and runs down the street to repay his debt to the pig farmer. The pig farmer takes the €100 note and heads off to pay his bill at the supplier of feed and fuel. The guy at the Farmers' Co-op takes the €100 note and runs to pay his drinks bill at the pub. The publican slips the money along to the local prostitute drinking at the bar, who has also been facing hard times and has had to offer him "services" on credit. The hooker then rushes to the hotel and pays off her room bill to the hotel owner with the €100 note. The hotel proprietor then places the €100 note back on the counter so the rich traveller will not suspect anything. At that moment the traveller comes down the stairs, picks up the €100 note, states that the rooms are not satisfactory, pockets the money, and leaves town. No one produced anything. No one earned anything. However, the whole town is now out of debt and looking to the future with a lot more optimism. And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, is how the bailout package works.

"Thanks to Mr. Rajiv Jaggi for sending this by email".

Can anyone say what went wrong in this?

Quran Says: Oh! you who believe. Do not eat your wealth among yourself unlawfully. (Without a satisfied deal between parties involved)